Great Day Ending With a Rainbow - July 8

If a good day is our starting point, today was a GREAT day. Brianna even said so when Grandma Close asked her how she was doing this morning. She seemed to be a little more aware of what was happening around her and she talked several times making perfect sense.
Today was the service for Max Lacewell and we decided that I would attend alone so Bob could watch Brianna. It is becoming more difficult and requires more strength to help her get around. We didn’t feel we should leave that burden with the grandmas. Bob and I were watching the morning news then we heard Brianna talking to Max. Bob pressed mute and I moved closer to her bed to see if I could hear what she was saying (it’s difficult to understand her because her speech is slurred most of the time), but I did hear her say something about him sliding across the floor and she wanted to play rock, paper, scissors… I assume she was still talking to Max.
With Brianna’s short term memory loss, she asked Bob where I was today and he said I went to Max’s funeral. She must have forgotten that I told her previously because she began to cry so Bob had to talk her through the emotional moment and give her peace of mind that he is o.k. and she will be o.k. too.
At dinner tonight Bob took his turn at saying grace and told us what he was thankful for. This has been a long tradition in our family and has become a little difficult because when everyone would take their turn the first think we would say we were thankful for was that everyone was safe and healthy. Now it has become something like, we are altogether, had a good day, etc. Tonight, something inspired Brianna to recite the Hail Mary which we have never done at dinner. I asked her why she recited the Hail Mary and she told me that Mary told her to. WOW!!
It takes a long time for Brianna to eat her meals so I sat alone with her for 20-30 minutes after everyone else was done. I noticed once during this time she made another sign of the cross and prayed quietly by herself. It brings me a great deal of peace when I see Brianna making the sign of the cross at random times, then folding her hands in prayer. She is an inspiration to me as I cannot muster the strength or the nerve to pray some of these days. If she can…then I should be able to no matter what!! Lesson learned!
Sometimes it’s difficult to tell if Brianna is having a delusion or is making perfect sense. I decided to press on and ask a few questions then sat quietly listening to her talk. Sometimes talking to me, while other times she talked to no one in particular. I heard her discussing birthdays and she was talking about Joseph. Once again, I was not able to understand what she was saying, but I asked her, “Who’s the Joseph you’re talking about?” She gave me “the look” and said, “Jesus’ father!” Duh, who else would she be talking about…I am so dense! Then she proceeded to tell me for her next birthday she wants to see the big boat with a ribbon. I had no idea where she was going with this but it eventually became clear she was describing Noah’s Ark! I agreed with her…how cool would that be, it’s HUGE!
Lately, Brianna has been talking a lot about packing a bag or suitcase. When I slept with Brianna a few weeks ago I would woke to find her in her closet with clothes spread out all over the room as if she was ready to pack for a vacation. Yesterday, she made mention of a suitcase on three different occasions. The social worker was here and said that it is a common end of life scenario when people begin discussing packing, travelling, etc. At dinner tonight she told me items I should pack in her bag. Coolio (her beta fish…it died 3 days ago but we didn’t tell her), a few toys (maybe Max is making a few requests because the items are not typical Brianna toys), a mattress (I guess she likes her bed too much), special toothpaste, toothbrush and mouthwash (glad she is into good hygiene), and her Hope Bear (her stuffed, praying bear which is her security item.)
I find a lot of this reassuring but also scary at the same time. I am definitely very reassured that she has reached a level of faith that I don’t think I will ever reach! Though she still gets worried and tells us she is scared, she must also feel God’s love taking care of her, especially when she is able to feel and speak openly about what she is seeing, hearing, and feeling. Today was a GREAT day!
By the way, I missed it…but I heard there was a rainbow at the end of the rainy day today. Must be a sign from Max that things are good and beautiful! God Bless Everyone!